Handjobs Signify What, Exactly?

    Recently I was helping my younger brother edit a piece he'd written back during his college days, some years ago at the University of Oregon's school of journalism. The piece was about that equal parts failed, grandeous, and distinctly American institution named Amtrak: the federally owned and operated passenger train system that covers a pretty decent swath of the continental U.S.
    My brother, on the verge of applying for a staff-writer position at the LA Weekly magazine, needed the piece to be cut with a slightly more adult blade than the one he'd cut it with back in his early 20s, back when it was still acceptable for him to call women his own age "girls." I was up to the task, or so I thought...
    The piece was interesting, sure. It was well thought out, pertinent, and filled with the kinds of factoids and experiences and reflections that make for meaningful journalism. And yet there was one problem, for, amidst all the interesting factoids and experiences and reflections my brother'd gathered over the course of a trip he'd taken from Portland, Oregon, to Cincinnati, Ohio (to visit yours truly), one question remained unanswered for both him and myself: what, if anything, should he do with the handjob story? See, one of the most interesting things to have happened to my brother over the course of his adventure across 2/3 of the continental U.S. happened in a steamed-up sleeping car between him and some girl from South Carolina who was unfortunately, or fortunately (depending on your perspective), clad in nothing but spandex.
    Which prompted me to ask: what, exactly, is the significance of a handjob in our day and age?